When Xavier was in the 2nd grade, Jennifer Fisher, who was his teacher at the time called and said I needed to head up to the school. She was a wonderful teacher, and I didn’t know what would have her so frazzled.
When I got there, she was almost in tears and said Xavier had been sent to the principal’s office by another teacher at recess for saying “hell.” He told another little boy on the wall, “If you love Jesus, you go to heaven. I’ve never been there, but I’ve heard it was a great place. If you don’t love Jesus, you go to hell, and it is a bad, bad place.” Jennifer was upset because she knew Xavier’s heart and didn’t like the fact that he had gotten in trouble.
I found the teacher and we had a discussion on whether he could continue to say “hell.” I argued that if his dad said it from the pulpit, there was nothing wrong with it. She responded that he couldn’t say hell because other children would want to say it and might not use it in the same manner. We ended up at Bo’s office, who was the elementary principal at the time. By then we were both worked up. Bo always had such a laid-back, calming presence. When we approached him, he said he had told Xavier he used it in the right way and to go back to class. Jennifer and I were both relieved, but Xavier was still upset. He said, “I didn’t know it was a bad word. Daddy has said it at church before.” Because of this, he refused to ever say that word again.
What we had to explain to Xavier was the right way and the wrong way to say “hell.” In and of itself, it is not a bad word. Words are like food and weapons, neither good nor bad. The way we use them is what matters. Words are necessary for us to communicate with each other, and people have labeled them good or bad. When used in the right way, hell is not a bad word. It is naming an actual place in the Bible. We didn’t want to offend that teacher, but we also wanted Xavier to have the liberty of witnessing.
**Therefore, let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother. I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is unclean for anyone who thinks it unclean. For if your brother is grieved by what you eat, you are no longer walking in love. By what you eat, do not destroy the one for whom Christ died. So do not let what you regard as good be spoken of as evil. For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding. Romans 14:13-19
We explained to Xavier that if this teacher thinks hell is a cuss word, don’t say it around her. We try to live our lives so we don’t intentionally offend others, but we still cannot let them dictate how we live.
Benny is a hard, deep sleeper. When awoken abruptly, he startles easily and sometimes comes up swinging. The kids and I have learned over the years to touch his feet when we want to wake him. It allows his body to react any way it wants and gives us enough room back up if needed. Benny said his dad startles when woke suddenly from a deep sleep, too. He said they would toss small couch pillows at him when they were young to wake him, so they wouldn’t have to get too close.
COVID was unexpected and as a people in whole, we ran on a mental adrenaline rush for weeks trying to stay ahead of the crisis and figure out the best ways to keep everyone safe. After a while, our bodies and minds got tired of flight or flight, and we were lulled “to sleep,” so to speak. America reminds me of a sleeping giant and we are all trying to figure out how to wake her with the least amount of consequences.
Lately, I have found myself in the same situation Xavier was. Each of us have our own way of waking from this “dream.” Some wake abruptly, are wide awake immediately, ready to take on the day. Others wake more subtly, like waiting for coffee to take effect and are being more cautious. We are also having to navigate around others in a way we’ve never had to before. This a learning experience for each of us, and no matter how we wake, we’ll need to give each other room to do what we are comfortable with.
I want to be understanding and allow for those who think differently than I do. But just like Xavier witnessing, I also want to be allowed the freedom to come out of the COVID the way I feel led without offending those around me. The Holy Spirit speaks to each of us differently, and we must each obey and do as we feel led. Eventually, I pray we will all be on the same page and life will resume as normal.
I want the old normal back. I want to be able to hug others or shake their hands without fear of offending them. I want to sit down with those I love at restaurants and enjoy coffee or a meal together. I want to go to see people smiling at each other again, instead of being suspicious. I want the little town of Sudan to be Mayberry again.
**About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Acts 16:25
Paul wrote those words while in the ultimate quarantine, prison. He and Silas were shackled to the wall or to guards at all times. May I have joy and continue to sing and praise God, even in the hard times…
COVID will eventually be over, and when it is, if you see me, please stop and say hi or give me a hug. Until then, I pray that as America (the giant) wakes, she is a happy soul!!
God, thank You that You are still LORD over all. Thank You for providing so abundantly and generously during our times of crisis. Please lead, guide, and direct us in how we are to each to “wake the giant.” This is uncharted territory, and we need to hear your voice above all. Continue to be with those affected by the corona. Heal their bodies and be with their families as they take care of them. Thank You that You never sleep or slumber, and that You are always open and ready to hear from us and give us direction. Amen
ON THE PORCH 