CLASHING OARS

**In His hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all mankind.  Job 12:10

Benny and I bought a kayak a couple of years ago to row at Chalk Bluff.  The river was still, calm, and easy to maneuver.  We had a blast and it made for great memories.

While at Quitaque last week, we decided to go out on the water together.  Benny held the kayak while I awkwardly climbed inside and sort of plopped onto my seat.  He sat in the back position, and I was in front of him.  I leaned back and looked around while Benny rowed us out onto Lake Theo.

All went well until I put my oars in the water.  I pulled one way, and Benny heaved another.  We were trying to take the kayak in opposite directions.  Not only were we both rowing against each other, but we were basically going in circles. 

I removed my oars from the water and allowed him to get our trajectory corrected and we started moving again. 

Instead of enjoying this uninterrupted time with my husband, I looked at the shore where family members were swimming and fishing.  Then I looked at the paddle in my lap.  The last thing I wanted was for anyone to think I wasn’t pulling my share of the work, so I lowered my oars again. 

With Benny sitting behind me, I couldn’t see him, just his oars as they sliced through the water. I tried my best to synchronize my movements with his but kept failing.  Even more frustrating was the fact that my oars kept striking his, clashing, clanging, and stopping any progress either of us made.  He quietly stopped and tried to coordinate with me, but it was no use. 

Both of us were getting aggravated.  I finally gave in and pulled my oars back out of the water, laying them across the kayak.  I would allow him to control our path and take us where he wanted. We finished our sail and made it back to the shore without further incident.

Benny is a strong man and made good headway when left alone to row for the both of us.  He is also a very kind and generous husband.  He didn’t mind taking on the extra work to allow me to relax, take in the scenery, and enjoy his company.  I am the one who looked at the shore and took that “extra responsibility” away from him.  I wanted to carry my own weight and show that I was not a burden.  So, our relaxing trip around Lake Theo turned into a frustrating struggle to just get to the end of the lake and back.  We did not have the fellowship or pleasure we anticipated when we entered the water.

**Then He got into the boat and His disciples followed Him. Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” 

He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.

The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey Him!”  Matthew 8:23-27

Verse twenty-four caught my attention.

**Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.  Matthew 8:24

“BUT JESUS WAS SLEEPING…”

While the storm raged, Jesus slept.  While the winds howled, Jesus slept.  When waves came up over the side and into the boat, Jesus slept.  While the disciples were bailing water and terrified, Jesus slept. 

When talking to a precious sister the other morning about all that is raging, she said “Jesus could sleep in the boat because He is God.”  She knew in her heart that He already has our storms under control and can rest knowing that.

The verses say the “storm suddenly arose.”  It doesn’t say it was anyone’s fault, it just appeared out of nowhere.  There were no warnings or alarms.  It was totally unexpected, and the men were unprepared.  I know now, since I’ve read the end of the story what the purpose of the raging sea was.  But the disciples were terrified for their lives and had no clue what would materialize.

Storms suddenly arise in all our lives. This is a fallen world, and hard things happen a lot.  Some storms feel like a West Texas wind, while others feel like a hurricane.  Each one begs an answer from the bottom of my soul.  Will I ask Jesus to take the lead, or will I try to keep the burden and continue to bail water from the boat with my tiny little bucket?  Will my oars clash and clang with His and frustrate His plan, or will I pull them back in the kayak and allow Him to carry me?  Do I totally trust Him, or do I have to be in charge??

How I respond during these times of trials and tribulations will either make me or break me. 

In our little kayak, Benny had it completely under control until I added my oars to the water.  He offered me a reprieve from the hustle and bustle of the trip.  He wanted to take my burden.  He gladly accepted the extra responsibility in exchange for allowing me to relax and enjoy his company. 

Instead, I rejected his gift and was determined to carry my own weight.  It only ended in frustration and aggravation.  I allowed my stubbornness to rob both of us of the pleasure of that precious time together.  And for the record, we never got another chance to kayak together on that trip.

God always has a plan set in motion for my life.  He works in the background constantly.  The moment I lower my oars into the water and start rowing against Him, I get nowhere.  I end up frustrated and turning in circles, and ask Him why we aren’t going anywhere, why nothing changes. 

The disciples were terrified until they allowed Jesus to take over.  I, too, find myself scared and afraid of what the future holds when I am in the raging storms that suddenly arise in my life.  That isn’t how He wants me to live.  He wants me to focus on Him and what He will do, not the storm.   

Another sweet sister of mine has a prayer she repeats as often as necessary that fits these times of trial so perfectly, “GOD, I CAN’T, BUT YOU CAN.” 

LORD, You know every fear and worry that plagues my mind and heart.  Raging storms and howling winds appear out of nowhere and knock me on my butt.  Waves crash over my life and worry consumes me.  I know You’re in control, but I still hold onto my oars and row furiously with everything in me. Take the tiny bucket I’ve been bailing water out of my boat with as a sacrifice of obedience.  Receive the oars that have exhausted every cell in my being and replace them with the ability to lean back and grant You permission to take us anywhere You desire. You slept in the boat with the disciples because You already had it worked out, and You offer me the same.  I’m tired of rowing, LORD.   “God, I can’t, but You can.”  Guide me through the storms and deliver me safely to shore.  In Your precious and holy name, Amen.

I’LL BE OKAY